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Keep Your Head Held High

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When all you know how to do is start over and drag yourself down. It just takes you in this complete vicous cycle. When do you start to make changes from these mistakes and learn and grow even more. I was doing so great with all the changes. Then some things happened I got knocked down again. Now I sit here thinking of all the pros and cons of the choices I have made to get me to this place I am at. My kids love this new place, these new people, and all the new experiences. I however feel the wicked pull of depression and the demons that wait amongst it all. I have always been so good at hiding it, and just smiling through the day. However I am feeling right now, I need to keep pushing and making some amazing new choices. One day and one step at a time is what I keep telling myself. I am greatful, thankful, and hopeful for something good. I started seeing a doctor again. She got me on a mood stabalizer, and it seems to be doing a number on my emotions. I have my daily inhaler, emerg
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New Journey!

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I haven't posted in so long! But I wanted to make a new journey for myself and my kids. Things have started all over again. But that's okay becuase everytime you get knocked down. It's time to get back up pick up the pieces and put yourself back together again. That's exactly what I did. My kids and I are doing great. Mentally I have been able to grow so much and move on from the things that were holding me down and holding me back. We are seeing new things and experiencing great places too. I want to try to post more at least once a week or so about our lives and what's going on. I still want to include as much as I can with Health issues and coping with life at the same time! I look forward to sharing with you all!
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Where The Beans Grow?

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Alright so let's talk about some of those delicious homegrown green beans that everyone just loves. Okay so I can't say I have gotten much of those this year from my garden. I was able to get enough to freeze for a roast or stew of some sort. But was not as bountiful as I would of like the plants to be. So story time with bean plants. There isn't much of a story. Just like the rest of the garden we tilled up a spot, did our rows, planted the seeds, watered as much as possible when it wasn't raining. But didn't try to over water. May of involved watering the kids when they got in the way. Of course those hot days they wanted to play in the water. Anyway, our first try with them. The plants had grown a bit and then shriveled up and died. In my mind I'm thinking "What the heck did I do wrong?" As I have done with most of our lovely garden. I proceeded to pull them. Then decided nah I'll leave the plants here see what they do. If they do nothing th
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Mowing With The Fibro

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Let's have our first talk about dealing with Fibromyalgia, there is a story that goes along with this.To describe it to those of you who don't know what it is. Well it's a pain. I mean literally a pain or pains. Pins and needles, sometimes even stabbing pains. You will have them for no reason whatsoever. Could be walking along then bam the "Fibro Goblin", as mom my calls it, just comes up and feels like he's done stabbed you. There honestly is so many symptoms for this disorder. Everyone experiences it differently. Mostly tho it's the dang pain that gets you. Mine usually sets in my legs and my feet. So waking up in the morning is slow. I have jumped out of bed and fallen flat on the ground cause the pain was that bad.I have weakness in my right arm and what Tim calls the "Dropsies." There are days it is so bad, and sleep won't come. That all one can do is cry and wish for it to go away. Okay so let's get onto the story for the day.
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Datura Stramonium AKA "Jimson Weed"

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Okay so let's talk about some weeds. When gardening, having a farm, or anywhere really. There are always those dreaded weeds. Then there are those that are pretty and you think to yourself "Oh I wonder what this pretty plant is?" Come to find out that "pretty plant" is actually poisonous. Who knew? Well I found one of those "pretty plants". I won't lie I do think it is still pretty. But after some research on the beauty she is a poisonous weed that will give you some amazing visions. Okay so she's will make you hallucinate. Her name is Datura Stramonium or Jimson Weed. It has been used in traditional medicine to help treat ailments. Although this "pretty plant" is a halucinogen, it is unlikely to become addictive. As discoveries have concluded that the unpleasentness on the mind and body are not what one would really want at all with a potentially fatal outcome. I admire this plants elegance. But I will not be playing with her anyti
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A Berry Strawberry Failure

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Failures are failures. But it's what we learn from those failures that keeps us going. So here is the story about my Strawberries. Tim and my daughter Lily had worked so hard on building me this cute little Strawberry box. Which from these pictures you can't see very well. But trust me it is there. Then we dug up a little ground so we could make it a little more level. After that Tim went and grabbed some manure & soil mixture. We planted them watered them regularly and waited. Now I was all excited because this would be my first go at growing my very own Strawberry plant. I grew up with some amazing fresh Strawberries in my parents backyard.I love fresh Strawberries. Even fresh fruits and veggies. What's not to love? Well you would think with all the love and attention I was giving these amazing plants, something would of happened. Next, came the weeding out part. So I start going to town. I may or may not of pulled them. Honestly after doing a bit of research there
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The Beginning

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Today is the start of an amazing journey. Okay so we started this journey back in April. It has not gone so well this year. Here it is September and we finally got a baby Roma Tomato looking like it might show some progress. We lost the majority of our garden. Which in turn makes one feel like a failure. But I have to remember this is our first year. You will have your failures. It's what you learn from these failures that matters. I am currently still doing research to find out what I might be able to change for next year, or when and what we decide to plant next. This first year we planted Strawberries, Roma tomatoes, 2 other types of tomatoes, Cucumbers, Broccoli, Carrots, Peas, Green beans, and 3 types of potatoes. Our carrots look all kinds of shrunken and tiny. We have a few Roma's doing something now. Managed to get a handful of Green Beans to freeze, and some potatoes. With our potatoes the plants died before the potatoes could get very big. I took what we had and go
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